By Mehnaz Thawer
“I hope I never turn into my mother.” This is a phrase that I’ve heard more than once in my lifetime. Mostly I’ve overheard it on the bus, or in the movies. It’s a phrase I’ve never understood fully. Though I can understand that not all of us are bestowed with perfect mothers, sometimes there are opportunities for us to learn from them. I for one, can’t think of a better person to turn into as I age for so many reasons:
Work Ethic
My mother instilled in me a work ethic that has helped me through academics and through my work life. Beyond any talent, the sensibility to work hard, and do your job well is something that is valued in almost every situation that I have been in. Were it not for my mother, telling me to test my own limits, or teaching me one more new word, I wouldn’t understand the value of a good work ethic.
Family
Aside from family reunions being a clever ruse to eat until we vomit, family is a central part of my life. In my world, though we may not have time for family dinners because of hectic schedules, we value each other’s contributions and support each other through most decisions, big and small, from career changes to recipe alterations to wardrobe critiques, the central place of family life is pivotal and has allowed me to grow up and become part of something larger than myself.
Resilience
I don’t take bad news well. I generally want to sleep off the rest of the year when I’m stuck in a rut or when life takes an unexpected turn of events. Growing up around my mother has taught me that no matter what, you have to get up in the morning. If there is a lesson to be learned, file it for future reference and move on with the rest of your life. Resilience is important in how we interact with each other and in the workplace. The best of us have to react at one time or another to something that isn’t of our liking. Resilience is the ability to walk on.
Self Respect
Gen Y women face quite a challenge ahead of them when it comes to self respect. Though opportunity is available for the grab more than ever, is it ever okay to compromise who you are as a person, in the name of achievement? Fame? Love? My mother has taught me that you are your own best friend, so you should treat yourself as a person of value. If you wouldn’t do it to your best friend, why do it to yourself?
It’s difficult for me to process that becoming my mother could be a bad thing. I inherited her curly hair and bad eyesight, but I also inherited a host of traits and perspectives that I wouldn’t trade for the world. So the next time, you think that your mother is the last person you would want to turn into, ask yourself, “Would it be a bad thing?”
Mehnaz Thawer
Mehnaz is an international development practitioner and lives in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. She writes regularly and has been published in several creative writing journals to date including Iamb, White Chimney and 4 and 20 poetry. She enjoys reading, photography, blogging and running. You can visit her blog at www.strawberryghetto.blogspot.com.
