By Mauro Segura
I know business executives who have been very successful in their own careers. Yet they’ve faced tremendous difficulties in helping their kids as they embark on their own professional journey. At this moment, all parents find themselves in the same boat. It doesn’t matter if you’re got a PhD from Harvard, or if you’ve led thousands of employees in your corporation. Much of what we learn in the business world just doesn’t cut it inside the household.
In the past, things were much more difficult. Young people had much more difficulty obtaining information in regards to professions, and even areas of specialization. This process depended very much on the interest and initiative students took to explore and discover things for themselves. You really had to get out “in the field” to obtain correct information, and gain knowledge about new careers, understanding if they were for you or not.
I remember the “old” vocational test, which wasn’t particularly captivating or insightful. Actually, if I had based myself on the test, I would have studied Geography, and probably become a Librarian.
The reality today is different. The world is interconnected and this “opening” helps a lot. Information is delivered straight to your home, via the Internet, and through other channels of communication. Students are bombarded with information. What hasn’t changed is the need for initiative and curiosity on the part of young people, so that they can understand all the options, hear advice, and exchange ideas. This is exactly how parents can help their children.
What inspired me to write this post are some conversations, I’ve recently had with both my sons. They are at the beginning of their professional careers, and yet they are full of doubts and dilemmas.
The following steps come from the practical experience I’ve gained from my friends and coworkers, as well as from my own experience in dealing with my children.
1- UNDERSTAND WHAT SUCCESS IS TO HIM OR HER. This is crucial, it’s important not to assume that your conception of success is the same as the conception your son or daughter has. Success is relative. What success is for him or her may not be what it is for you.
2- AVOID BEING ASSERTIVE
Don’t be affirmative all the time. In the end, advice that is very pragmatic can pressure your child into taking a path that he or she wouldn’t naturally take.
3- HAVE AN OPEN CONVERSATION
Your most important role as a parent is to create an environment in which you can exchange ideas, and have an open conversation, free from the “right” or “wrong” way of thinking.
4- LISTEN MORE THAN YOU SPEAK
Encourage your child to speak about his or her worries, decisions, doubts, and interests. Most likely, the things your child is feeling are not so different from what you felt as a young person. So remember that. Make sure to keep an open mind during these conversations.
5- INCENTIVATE YOUR CHILD TO EXPLORE, DISCOVER, AND SEARCH FOR INFORMATION.
Give your child the incentive to search for information regarding careers, professions, and above that encourage him or her to speak to other people about these things. Even your own friends are a great option, and you can and should facilitate those connections.
6- DON’T DO THE WORK FOR THEM
Please don’t do the research for them. They are responsible for that, and if they really want to know and are really interested, you don’t have to do anything. Your child will look for you, with all the needed information already in hand.
7- HELP YOUR CHILD DISCOVER THEIR NATURAL STRENGHTS
Motivate them to self-reflect, and think about what sort of work they would love to do.
8- ALWAYS BE AVAILABLE FOR A DIALOGUE
It’s extremely important to always be available for a dialogue. This will be a blessing for your child. Your child will probably live moments full of doubt, as he or she struggles to make important decisions. You can help by always being there.
9- HAVE PATIENCE. THEY NEED TIME.
If you have patience, you will help your child immensely. During these moments, your most important mission is to encourage your child to continue thinking and conversing. Encourage them to question themselves. There’s no rush.
10- ACCEPT ENTREPREUNERSHIP AS AN OPTION
The future of the job market indicates that more and more, workers will be entrepreneurs. The first “entrepreneur” moment for your child is at the beginning of his or her career. Open conversations and paradigms, as well as keeping an open mind and perspective, are key to helping your child as they embark on their career.
Another recommendation is to not preoccupy yourself if your child ends up choosing the same field as you. Even if you feel that he or she has been a bit influenced by you. The biggest preoccupation you should have is to make sure that he or she made this choice, based on their own initiative and desires.
In conclusion, despite the fact that this new generation is very informed, and mature in terms of their knowledge of careers, they also have the same anxieties and worries as we did in the past.
Imagining what you would have liked to get from your own parents, can serve as inspiration when dealing with your kids. Just don’t forget that the world is going through many social changes, where professional success probably won’t be obtained through a fixed salary at the end of each month. After all, entrepreneurship is personal satisfaction…
